Bildschirmjaeger
Rifleman
Bavaria, 1944. 31st October
Rasthaus Adler.
Kurt: Well do you recognise me? I guess not… *sigh!* …does the name Barbie ring a bell? Right! I was taken hostage by her… But I managed to survive. I also made you guys a promise: I would return. But! I’m no longer a normal Waffen-SS officer, I’ve joined a secret branch of the SS: I’m on a constant mission to kill all creatures from hell who still have the guts to visit Germany.
Waitress: Here’s you extra bottle of beer, Herr Meyer.
Kurt: Thank you Frau Weber…. The same as always… keep the change *cough!* …..erm yes that’s one of my nasty habits…taking a lot of alcohol… don’t tell the guys from high command about it, okay? Well… were was I? oh yes… the special SS mi…
*HARK!* Noooooooooooooooo please!
Kurt: Oh well… so far for the introduction…
Kurt: Well, Frau Weber… Thanks for you hospitality….*cough!*
And what about you 1/6 scale addicts? Still dare to see me on a mission? ….Okay then…
Kurt rushes for the Bavarian Gauhaus, where the call came from. Thunder cracks. he stormed the stairs, then he found Gauleiter Wagner lying on the floor, is he dead?
Kurt: Damn! Am I too late? The fiend left it’s prey…
Kurt: Well I can try one thing, I can give the Gauleiter some holy water… It can undo the attack of a true devil, and humans can be healed by it’s powers. I hope it is a demonic attack, he will not wake up if it isn’t.
Gauleiter Wagner: Where… where… Am…I?
Kurt: You’re still at the Gauhaus…Herr Gauleiter. You’ve been attacked by…. a fiend from Hell…. I called you back to the living with the power of holy water.
Gauleiter: *Hark!* Where’s my wife????? It took her! The last thing I can remember is hearing her scream! …..No please! ….If she died I will die with her!
The Gauleiter is heavily shocked, but then something comes back to him.
Hmmmm…It wasn’t meant for my ears, but I heard something about an SS demon slayer, by the name of Kurt Meyer, here in my Gau… I heard you talking about holy water, so that must be you. Be honest with me!
Kurt: *cough!* Yes Herr Gauleiter, I am.
Gauleiter: So you can also bring back my wife?
Kurt: I would do anything to protect German citizens.
Gauleiter: Well then, what keeps us?
Kurt: HUH? Are you sure you want to come with me?
Gauleiter: Yes slayer, the demon must still be here now… I’m with you.
Kurt: *cough!* well then… off we go!
Gauleiter: Shouldn’t you first visit the detox?
Kurt: …Shouldn’t you first worry about the mission… HERR GAULEITER?
Then a gate to hell opens… there’s a creature inside that looks very angry, and is ready for mortal flesh!
Gauleiter: WTF! There is it! That’s the thing I saw!
Kurt: Okay pheasant, get yourself ready! Take my bible, if I get in real deep sh*t, read some passages for me!
Gauleiter:Gotcha!
Kurt: Away with you! I’ll send you back to the pits of hell, where you belong!
ROAAARRR!
Gauleiter: this one’s for my wife!
Kurt: hey nice technique, pheasant!
Gauleiter: I do it all day, so I guess I’m good at it…
Kurt: It’s time for the last act! The bible. It looks like we’re getting your wife back… Now’s the time pheasant: read!
Gauleiter: right!
From the sixth hour until the ninth hour darkness came over all the land. About the ninth hour Jesus cried out in a loud voice, "Eloi, Eloi lama sabachthani?"—which means, "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?" When some of those standing there heard this, they said, "He's calling Elijah."
The Gauleiter reads the passage slowly, the monster is getting weaker, and roars… but the Gauleiter kept reading, this is the final moment of the beast.
The body of the beast disappeared and made place for the wife of the Gauleiter, she seems all right, and slowly wakes up.
Gauleiter: Meine Liebe!
Frau Wagner: ….mhhhh… where am I?
Gauleiter: Meine Liebe, that’s a long story!
Kurt: jeez, where would I be without my bible…
Gauleiter: Kurt, I wanted to thank you…I… HUH? Where did he go?
I hope you guys liked my Halloween bash
See you next year!
Greetz from Holland, Anouk
Rasthaus Adler.
Kurt: Well do you recognise me? I guess not… *sigh!* …does the name Barbie ring a bell? Right! I was taken hostage by her… But I managed to survive. I also made you guys a promise: I would return. But! I’m no longer a normal Waffen-SS officer, I’ve joined a secret branch of the SS: I’m on a constant mission to kill all creatures from hell who still have the guts to visit Germany.
Waitress: Here’s you extra bottle of beer, Herr Meyer.
Kurt: Thank you Frau Weber…. The same as always… keep the change *cough!* …..erm yes that’s one of my nasty habits…taking a lot of alcohol… don’t tell the guys from high command about it, okay? Well… were was I? oh yes… the special SS mi…
*HARK!* Noooooooooooooooo please!
Kurt: Oh well… so far for the introduction…
Kurt: Well, Frau Weber… Thanks for you hospitality….*cough!*
And what about you 1/6 scale addicts? Still dare to see me on a mission? ….Okay then…
Kurt rushes for the Bavarian Gauhaus, where the call came from. Thunder cracks. he stormed the stairs, then he found Gauleiter Wagner lying on the floor, is he dead?
Kurt: Damn! Am I too late? The fiend left it’s prey…
Kurt: Well I can try one thing, I can give the Gauleiter some holy water… It can undo the attack of a true devil, and humans can be healed by it’s powers. I hope it is a demonic attack, he will not wake up if it isn’t.
Gauleiter Wagner: Where… where… Am…I?
Kurt: You’re still at the Gauhaus…Herr Gauleiter. You’ve been attacked by…. a fiend from Hell…. I called you back to the living with the power of holy water.
Gauleiter: *Hark!* Where’s my wife????? It took her! The last thing I can remember is hearing her scream! …..No please! ….If she died I will die with her!
The Gauleiter is heavily shocked, but then something comes back to him.
Hmmmm…It wasn’t meant for my ears, but I heard something about an SS demon slayer, by the name of Kurt Meyer, here in my Gau… I heard you talking about holy water, so that must be you. Be honest with me!
Kurt: *cough!* Yes Herr Gauleiter, I am.
Gauleiter: So you can also bring back my wife?
Kurt: I would do anything to protect German citizens.
Gauleiter: Well then, what keeps us?
Kurt: HUH? Are you sure you want to come with me?
Gauleiter: Yes slayer, the demon must still be here now… I’m with you.
Kurt: *cough!* well then… off we go!
Gauleiter: Shouldn’t you first visit the detox?
Kurt: …Shouldn’t you first worry about the mission… HERR GAULEITER?
Then a gate to hell opens… there’s a creature inside that looks very angry, and is ready for mortal flesh!
Gauleiter: WTF! There is it! That’s the thing I saw!
Kurt: Okay pheasant, get yourself ready! Take my bible, if I get in real deep sh*t, read some passages for me!
Gauleiter:Gotcha!
Kurt: Away with you! I’ll send you back to the pits of hell, where you belong!
ROAAARRR!
Gauleiter: this one’s for my wife!
Kurt: hey nice technique, pheasant!
Gauleiter: I do it all day, so I guess I’m good at it…
Kurt: It’s time for the last act! The bible. It looks like we’re getting your wife back… Now’s the time pheasant: read!
Gauleiter: right!
From the sixth hour until the ninth hour darkness came over all the land. About the ninth hour Jesus cried out in a loud voice, "Eloi, Eloi lama sabachthani?"—which means, "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?" When some of those standing there heard this, they said, "He's calling Elijah."
The Gauleiter reads the passage slowly, the monster is getting weaker, and roars… but the Gauleiter kept reading, this is the final moment of the beast.
The body of the beast disappeared and made place for the wife of the Gauleiter, she seems all right, and slowly wakes up.
Gauleiter: Meine Liebe!
Frau Wagner: ….mhhhh… where am I?
Gauleiter: Meine Liebe, that’s a long story!
Kurt: jeez, where would I be without my bible…
Gauleiter: Kurt, I wanted to thank you…I… HUH? Where did he go?
I hope you guys liked my Halloween bash
See you next year!
Greetz from Holland, Anouk
